Not Exactly a Fairytale

I've always loved the story of Esther: a small-town orphan girl wins a beauty pageant and the crown she receives is to a real kingdom. At first glance it seems like textbook Disney material, but the "happily ever after" is still "far, far away". Esther has just been plucked from her home and placed in a pagan land. She finds herself married to a controlling ruler who struggles with drinking and rash decision-making. And then, when a plot to destroy the Jews is revealed, she risks it all. Esther could have said, "I don't want to jeopardize my position. No one will ever find out I am a Jew. I am going to be careful and play it safe." Little did she know it was God's plan for her to be there at that specific time in order to rescue her people. A bold girl in the right place at the right time saved an entire nation from annihilation.

The story of Esther is saturated with this theme of God's providence, even though He is never specifically mentioned. God’s supposed "absence" is used by the author to remind us how the Lord works through seemingly ordinary events to achieve His purposes. Esther teaches us that although we often cannot see God in the face of adversity, He is still present and orchestrating all things for our good.

Right now, I feel a little bit like Esther. No, I'm not living in a palace. No, I definitely won't be winning any beauty pageants. But I've left my family and moved to a foreign land alone; a place where I, as a Christian, am definitely in the minority. Esther's story reminds me that God has a specific purpose in bringing me to Salt Lake City. What comfort to know that He created me with this very plan in mind! Whatever overwhelming trial you are currently facing, God has a purpose for placing you in the midst of it. Will you take a stand?

 

Your reply may be, "But how?" Esther wasn't sure of God's plan either. Our next step won't always be clear. There will be times in your life when you've searched Scripture, prayed, sought wise advice, and yet a big unknown still remains. You can definitely take the time to sleep on it. Esther certainly did as she fasted and prayed for three days. But then there comes a point when you can wait no longer. You have to pull up your big girl (or boy) panties and step out in faith.

Today, let’s boldly step out and make ourselves available to God just as Esther did. God has created you, my friend, with a beautiful plan in mind. Perhaps it was for this particular trial, or to simply share the hope of eternal life! Be bold. Be courageous. And take faith. We may not have all the answers, but we certainly serve a God who does!

 
 

Not All Who Wander, Lust.

wanderlust (v.): a strong urge or desire to explore and enjoy the world

This earth is filled with wonder, and my heart with wanderlust.
God has given me such a desire to adventure and explore His dazzling creation.
It used to stress me out as I tried to compile a lengthy bucket-list of all the destinations I've dreamt of visiting, until Sunday when I heard a simple sentence that left a big impact and a content heart:

"the idea of our glorified bodies, gives us perspective to live with moderation"- Michael Spotts

Our bodies and life on earth are temporary, distorted by sin. But as Christians we have hope, because God has promised us the resurrection of both body and soul in Paradise.

"He will transform our lowly body to be like His glorious body"

- Philippians 3:21

The hope of having a physical body in the future, helps us to live moderately in the means by which we enjoy the earth God has given us in the now. Before, I was tempted to cram an entire eternity of bodily pleasures in my one mortal experience. How comforting that we don't have to be gluttonous, because there will be enough! How comforting to know that we don't have to be adulterous, because it will be far better to communion with Jesus! How comforting that the New Earth will be a marvelous gallery of God's craftsmanship, and we won't depend on money or other needs to explore it! When you embrace this truth in your heart, it will change the way you live your life. Knowing our time here is limited, we shift our focus to glorifying God, rather than ourselves.

Don't get me wrong. I still possess the desire to experience God's remarkable creation, but no longer the lust. It's not a frantic need, that if unfulfilled before I die, renders me hopeless. Because I know what's awaiting me in eternity is infinitely better. Not only do these assurances provide us with comfort, but we can also have JOY. Why distinguish the difference? Comfort takes the edge off of sorrow, but joy entails pleasure. We find joy by meditating on, and anticipating the next life.

Q: How does "life everlasting" comfort you?
A: Even as I already now experience in my heart the beginning of eternal joy, so after this life I will have perfect blessedness such as no eye has seen, no ear has heard, no man has ever imagined: a blessedness in which to praise God eternally.- Heidelberg Catechism

I am learning to sync my present condition, with the hope of the future. Instead of wandering, I wonder. Instead of lusting, I am content.

*adapted from Michael Spotts' sermon, "Trading in the Old Tent"

"Let Paris Go!"

Last night Paris, a city symbolic of love, cried out in heartbreak.

129 individuals were killed, 352 injured. These people are not just numbers. They are someone's children, someone's spouse, someone's friend.
Our first reaction might be to question, "Where is God in all of this?"
But we can call off the search party, because God has not left us.
He is still here, with you and me. He is still in Syria. He is still in Paris.

Do you remember when God's people were enslaved in Egypt? It seemed by all outward appearances that God had left them. But then He called Moses and commanded him to march before Pharaoh and his army and demand that they "Let My people go!"

Today we might not face Pharaoh and his army, but we do face the very same evil God's people have fought throughout all of history. 

The world can be a dangerous place, but the answer is not to cower from ISIS.

When we give into terror, we give into the very root of their cause.

As Christians, we are to take a stand.

"Be alert. Continue strong in the faith. Have courage and be strong."

-1 Corinthians 16:13

 

Courage has always been a necessary quality among the people of God. Standing for righteousness takes courage. Speaking the truth of the Gospel takes courage. Like Moses, you might be tempted to believe you don't have a voice, that what you say won't make a difference. But God declares otherwise:

"Just as I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will not leave you or forsake you. Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."- Joshua 1: 5, 9b

 

I changed my profile picture because it's a small way I can display this courage. A symbol that I back my neighbors, and that we will not let them be picked on without a fair fight. It's a symbol that I stand with Paris and a demand that ISIS "Let God's people go."

It may be weeks, it may be months, it may be years until this enemy is defeated. We might not even see the victory in our lifetime. But of this I have utmost confidence: there will be a day when the victory is won.
"Then comes the end, when He delivers the Kingdom to God the Father after destroying every rule and every authority and power"- 1 Corinthians 15:24

An Open Letter

"Measuring sticks try to rank some people as big and some people as small, but we aren’t sizes. We are souls. There are no better people or worse people, there are only God-made souls. There is no point trying to size people up, no point trying to compare, because souls defy measuring."

-Ann Voskamp

To my little sisters in Christ,

You are beautiful. Each and everyone of you. After all, you bear the very image of God! Any shortcomings you may perceive in your body, personality, gifts, and abilities in comparison to others is an insult to our Creator.
You were created with intention; no flaws or imperfections.
"I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made"- Psalm 139:14

But just in case you don't struggle with low-self esteem enough on your own,
sometimes people will step in to help and do the comparing for you.
Sometimes they will make polls to vote for who they think is prettiest.
Sometimes this will happen even in Christian institutions.

And for that, I'm so sorry.
It breaks my heart that I can't shield you from the hatred and evil in this world.
I pray that you will use these moments as opportunities to witness. To display God's grace. To define true beauty. Because the only thing that can drive out this sort of hatred is love- God's perfect, radiant love. This is a unique opportunity you have been given: "to let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” -Matthew 5:16

 

Lastly, remember that comparison is a deadly weapon. It robs joy. It beats people down. Rather than uniting us, it often drives the church apart. Be ever cautious and slow to judge. "Do not consider his appearance or his height,  for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

-1 Samuel 16:7

your sister,
Kyla

Not Waiting 'til Marriage

If I were to make a list of my flaws, impatience would definitely top it. Waiting is not something I am good at, or enjoy. Then this summer, my Facebook newsfeed suddenly exploded into a Pinterest wedding board.

While I am overjoyed for all my friends who are recently engaged/married, I can't help but notice my blaring singleness in a sea of happy couples. I am an exception to the Christian College norm. How much longer am I going to have to wait to find love?

I've been living under the impression that I deserve a relationship. Why else would God give me this innate desire for marriage? Am I a failure?

Our individualistic culture has bought into the idea that marriage can bring ultimate fulfillment. For many, it is the climax of their happiness. The "first day of the rest of their life."

Marriage is good, but above all we should seek God.

I was pursuing fulfillment and self-worth through my relationships with others, rather than Christ. Often in the church we hear "be the woman God made you to be, focus on that, and then the husband will come." But what if the husband doesn't come?

Don't get sold on a deal, rather than a Savior.

Christ is indeed the source of all blessing, but He is not the magic solution to life's problems-

 He is life itself!

So for now, I'm single and content in it.

Because I've decided I'm not going to wait until marriage.

"Cease striving and know that I am God."- Psalm 46:10

Stop waiting for "The One". Do not put your life on hold. Each day is a gift. Seek joy and growth and opportunities to really live. With a man by my side or not, I want to wake up every morning madly in love with my Savior, Jesus Christ. Every day. For the rest of my life.

"I'd rather have the right God than the wrong man."- Christen Rapske

Set a Fire

Fires are a constant threat here in the forest- especially in the middle of a drought. 
Currently a large fire has expanded to about 2,800 acres, while several hundred other small fires were touched off by lightning. 

But contradictory to Smokey the Bear, I would argue that fire isn't always a bad thing. 
Fires have several very important functions in the life of the Sequoia Forest:
1) it prepares a seedbed
2) it cycles nutrients
3) it removes any excess vegetative growth
4) it removes the threat of insects and disease to the trees

But most importantly, without fire the Giant Sequoia seed would remain trapped. Green cones can live for up to twenty years with viable seeds inside. Fire dries out the cones, enabling them to crack open and sprinkle their seeds on the forest ground. 

Fire plays much the same role in our spiritual lives.

"Fire has a refining element. It is the essence of the Holy Spirit's work. When He comes in power, He also comes to burn up the sin in our lives. He comes with conviction, searching our motives, uprooting our unforgiveness, and shattering our pride."

The Parable of the Sower found in Matthew 13 is the perfect example of this. Our seed of faith faces many obstacles: 
1) hard soil
2) poor root system
3) choking weeds
4) being snatched away
All of which fire helps combat. Although it sometimes appears as a threat, we need the refining work of the Holy Spirit to protect us from other dangers and purify our lives, so that the Word of God may find a viable home in our heart and the seed of faith may take root.

"when anyone hears the word of the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what has been sown in his heart... he who has no root, endures for awhile and when tribulation or persecution arises on account of the world immediately he falls away... As for what was sown among thorns, this is the one who hears the word, but the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word, and it proves unfruitful... As for what was sown on good soil, this is the one who hears the word and understands it. He indeed bears fruit and yields, in one case a hundredfold." - Matthew 13:18-23

"so set a fire down in my soul

that I can't contain and I can't control

I want more of You God,

I want more of You God."- Set a Fire

Faith of a Sequoia Seed

This is it. The last "summer" of my academic career.

I've had the awesome privilege of being one of the camp nurses here at Hume Lake, CA. Nestled deep in the heart of the Sequoia National Forest this ministry affects all it comes in contact with: camper, tourist, and employee (myself included).

Over the course of the past six weeks, the greatest analogy I have been continuously aware of is found in the small, yet mighty Sequoia seed.

The well-known proverb that "mighty oaks from little acorns grow" is more than accurate for this lifeform. Each seed is flat, about the size of a pinhead. Only with time and the right conditions will they grow to be Giants of the Forest attaining a staggering height of 300 feet. However, the odds of an individual seed germinating, surviving, and growing into a mature tree are less than one in a billion (not exactly in their favor). Making this little guy the definition of a miracle.

Sound familiar? It's almost exactly like the Parable of the Mustard Seed found in the Gospel.

"The Kingdom of Heaven is like a [Sequoia Seed] it is the smallest of all seeds but when it is grown it is LARGER than all the garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds of the air come and make nests in its branches."- Matthew 13:31&32

On the first day of orientation my boss gave me a Sequoia cone and reminded me of this truth. As she pressed it into the palm of my hand and enfolded my fingers around it she uttered a blessing, which I now leave for you:

"God loves you.

God cares for you.

God has a plan for you."

May your seed of faith continue to grow, so that as you face the mountains of life nothing will be impossible through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. - Matthew 17:20

Our Mountaintop Experience

My sister Ashlyn just completed her last week of high school and I couldn't be more proud of the young woman she has become! In order to celebrate, we packed up my car with way more luggage than appropriate for a simple week's vacation and set off on a roadtrip across California.

 

Our first stop- Salvation Mountain.

 

This beautiful testimony, found in the middle of the desert, was refreshing to the soul. Sculpted by Leonard Knight, it's truly an art masterpiece with the bold and recurrent message of:

 

"God is Love"



Mountains have always possessed significance as places of powerful, personal encounters with God. The very phrase mountain top experience originates from the Biblical accounts of God revealing Himself to Abraham at Mount Moriah (Genesis 22:2, 14), to Moses at Mount Sinai (Exodus 19, Deuteronomy 5), and to Elijah at Mount Carmel (1 Kings 18:24, 1 Kings 19:12).

But the greatest mountain-top experience of all time occurred on the Mount of Transfiguration: (Mark 9:2-7) "Jesus took with him Peter and James and John, and led them up a high mountain by themselves. And he was transfigured before them, and his clothes became radiant, intensely white, as no one on earth could bleach them. And there appeared to them Elijah with Moses, and they were talking with Jesus... And [Peter] did not know what to say, for they were terrified. And a cloud overshadowed them, and a voice came out of the cloud, 'This is my beloved Son; listen to him.'"

Peter was so awestruck in this moment that he wanted to never let it go. He wanted to stay forever in the sheer beauty and power. But faith can not be put in a box, or as Peter later suggested- a tent. The disciples had to leave the mountain and shortly after Jesus gave them the command to go into “the world and make disciples of all peoples, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.”



As fellow disciples of Christ, we might not come face to face with God or see historic fathers of the faith, but we too can have mountain top experiences- "a temporary, uncommon encounter with God that is meant to give us a fresh awareness of His reality and nearness."

As amazing as these experiences can be, I believe it is important to remember that they are meant to strengthen us for the journey back down. They sustain us so that we can share the Gospel message with others. Abraham had been to the mountain. Moses had been to the mountain. Elijah had been to the mountain. Jesus brought the disciples to the mountain. They came back changed and ready to work for God's vision. Our perspective changes as our personal problems are left on the dwarfed landscape and we are made aware of the grandeur of the God whom we serve.

In his famous speech, Martin Luther King Jr. once said, "We've got some difficult days ahead. But it really doesn't matter with me now, because I've been to the mountaintop."

Are you ready to not only go to the mountain, but return to serve God's kingdom? Because as dazzling as the mountain top is, there is much work that still needs to be done.

Value of Vulnerability

In a culture where we value strength and perfection, vulnerability is often viewed as weakness.
(the very word comes from its Latin root meaning "to wound")

Over the past year, I've strove to open up in my relationships and show the most intimate sides of myself to those whom I love. Some of this has been done right on these pages, through this blog.

How vulnerable are we as Christians? Most of us are slim to none.

We're self-protective, politically correct, and afraid.

Afraid of getting hurt. Afraid of being rejected. Afraid. Afraid. Afraid.

Instead of embracing vulnerability, we've done the exact opposite. We've built lives disconnected from love; lived defensively, detached, isolated and rigid, where one cannot personally grow or relationally grow with God and others.

Newsflash: there is no safety or security in this life. Our only guarantee is eternal life which Jesus has secured for us.

Vulnerability is good and even commanded from God. Jesus told us to have child-like faith. A young child is vulnerable- trusting, open, and accepting.

We all want to feel and know we are secure in this world, but to what degree can we and at what expense?

“There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket – safe, dark, motionless, airless – it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.” - C.S. Lewis

It's Still Easter

It's Monday, Easter's come and gone. And most of us are bombarded with life's distractions and long to-do lists after a weekend of relaxation.

It's easy to mentally set aside the message of Easter for another 364 days.

Jesus' resurrection isn't something to celebrate once a year and then place in the back of our minds. It’s something that should be on our hearts and influence our actions every single day.

But if we're honest with ourselves, we often fail to see the Resurrection evidenced in our everyday lives. We still argue with loved ones, we're still overwhelmed with work or school, we're saddened at the suffering and selfishness in the world around us. Like the two men on the Road to Emmaus we wonder, “But we had hoped that he was the one to redeem Israel” (Luke 24:21a).

Do things seem pretty much the same as before Easter Sunday? Are you still trying to fight sin with your own strength? Like the men on the Road to Emmaus, we too are in need of our eyes being opened:

Because Jesus lives, our sins are really forgiven. Because Jesus lives, the devil is really defeated. Because Jesus lives, resurrection and eternal life have been won for us.

Don't let this truth fade into the noise of your life.

The disciples surely didn't. They witnessed their Savior's crucifixion, and when they saw Him alive it changed their world.  They couldn’t help but spread the news. They didn't restrict celebrating to one mere day, but lived whole lives of celebration. They knew that because Jesus lived, they too would live.

May the reality of our Savior’s empty tomb fill you with joy, hope, and peace not only yesterday, but today, and every day to come.